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Mother Cusser's Inspirational Musings

Mother Cusser's Inspirational Musings

Live by these and you will grow up to be just like me!

Author: Mother Cusser/Monday, August 19, 2013/Categories: Tips to improve your life

<< That's not me. That's a famous statue crafted by Michaelangelo to be displayed at the top of the Eiffel Tower.  Google it. 

 

 

 

 

Inspirational saying ideas for you to pass around Facebook

DRAMA

D – Dumb

R –Really, dumb

A - AND it always involves

M – Mostly woman

A – Assholes

Just smile.

When a possum moves into your crawl space and pulls down your HVAC pipe just remember that next time you will put your half pit bull dog in there and the screams of the dying possum will make you smile.

Just breathe.

When you cough and you hear rattling, wheezing and firecracker noises in your lungs just breathe shallowly and call it “reactive airway disease” instead of asthma because insurance will go up if you call it asthma.

 
Laugh like you mean it.

When you accidentally refer to your rotund client and his tall, lean VP of Sales as Bert and Ernie right in front of their faces, laugh.  But try not to cry from laughing so hard because they will think you are sad.


Haiku
Head itches
A bug bites boys’ head happily

Fleas or lice. Who knows?

Pass these around facebook or you will have bad luck for 907 years and you also might win a free ipad.

Mother Cusser has all of the answers. 

Number of views (3815)/Comments (2)

2 comments on article "Mother Cusser's Inspirational Musings"

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Helena

10/9/2013 2:33 AM

love your blogs...

ps: Michelangelo or Rodin?


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Neighbor chick

11/21/2013 9:07 PM

I totally thought the naked dude was you! I could have sworn I saw chigger bites...

You crack me up! Once again, I'm reading your blog on the iPad, in bed, giggling annoyingly, with my hubby trying to sleep next to me... He keeps interrupting my blissfully happy moments by telling me it's bedtime, he has to wake up at 5am and needs his sleep... yada, yada, yakkity schmackity. I have a feeling Santa will be stuffing his stocking with earplugs, an eyemask and Benadryl this year...

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